A New Chapter
I know I’m not posting so much anymore but I really feel like tumblr triggers me. Im calling this “a new chapter” because that’s what this is for me. I did ridiculously stupid things but things seem to be looking up finally. I’ve moved to another state and I absolutely adore my new school. I’m with a lot of strange ass people and it’s not perfect but it’s different and I love that. I’ve started to make a change. I’m starting over and trying to become who I’ve always wanted to be. Im in all honors classes again and I actually have friends.. I try to be nice to everyone, from the annoying, fake ass, bitches to the bullied special needs kids. I started a club in my school focused on community service and I’m running a food drive (ironic I know). I’m in student council and I’ve even joined a club called “teens organized against drugs”… I know.. I know. Today I’m going out with a great guy who’s not into drugs and drinking. My eating disorder is still here but changing. Ive stopped binging as much but pretty much throw up everything i eat buy I’m getting help. I’m changing for the better and although I miss my old life, I’m becoming happy for the first time in forever. Wish me luck lovelies. I hope you find your paradise.
18th Feb with 0 notes
malice-in-wonder-land asked: Hey beautiful<3 I miss you so much.. Everything is so boring here.. I've been in OSS since last thursday and I don't get back to school until Friday. I'm so tried of being trapped in the house. My room is litterally color cordinated out of boredom (I never nocticed how much purple shit I owned lol) But anyway I hope youre doing well and everything is better up there!
Hey sorry im sorry I took so long to answer back but I’ve been trying to stay off of tumblr :/ how are things going now? Dude I miss you :’( but anyways I’m actually making progress and making friends and stuff idk it’s weird.. Like I’m not even faking it. And I’m
talking to this super cute junior who I like and he likes me a lot too.. I’m so happy like he’s perfect. And he doesn’t drink or smoke and hes so freaking nice. I think this was good for me (this move I mean) I feel like I’m getting stronger
Hope for Willow: This miserable existence is so lonely. ↘
So you stuff and stuff and stuff to try and fill the emptiness, even though you never do. Deep down you know that perhaps if you didn’t feel so numb and alone you might not have to do this, but that’s the thing about eating disorders, isn’t it? You isolate yourself from everyone who cares and who you love and eventually your disorder becomes the only thing you have because everyone else is gone. So you stuff and slurp and swallow and gargle and purge to stop the emptiness that’s not just on the inside anymore. It’s trapped you in a bell jar and filled your belly with stones, and even when you try to climb out of the well of loneliness you find you’ve sunk so far down that your screams are no more than a whisper and water fills your lungs. You’re sinking, little girl. Can you swim?
(Source: purgeahontas)
18th Jan with 8 notes
